I, yet again, made the mistake of going grocery shopping before midnight. This time, I shall inflict my opinion on the world and my future self.
Anyone who is considering parenthood or about to become a parent should spend a day inside a grocery store and a night in the parking lot of the same grocery store.
I like children, infants especially. They are the ultimate symbol of potential.
Most children in grocery stores are not cute. They are screaming, mess making monsters. But wait, I hear you say, children normally scream and make messes, it is part of who they are. True enough, but they only become monsters when you inflict them the general public.
Now, on to grocery store parking lots at night. Here you can see groups of listless children who never learned the
EBER maxim: “Early to bed and early to rise, makes a man healthy, wealthy, and wise.” (Look at the datestamp on this entry and note that I am not especially healthy, wealthy, or wise.) Anyway, look at these packs of kids. They sit on tailgates in dimly lit grocery store parking lots and dare each other to commit ill conceived deeds. This would not be so bad except that you cannot
know if these kids are a gang with criminal intent or merely listless youths.
It is 27 minutes until midnight. Do you know where your kid is?